My bitch looks 10000000000 times nicer with her new hairdo but i look 10000000000+0 times nicer LOL.

Tampines. anyone has difficulty pronouncing this word? heres a guide: "ten-penis". okay okay enough nonsense and i will get straight to the point; "everything in tampines is fucking fumb dumb". Just when i thought TP was dumb enough, tampines got angry and jealous so it proved to me that its the biggest dumb fuck in that area, hoho big surprise man. I'll list the stupid things 1 by 1 and classify them into categories: stupid, simply stupid and sickeningly stupid.


STUPID:
1. people who live in tampines are extremely skilled in urban ettiquette. eg: they think sitting in the front part of the bus is shameful, learn to stare at other people, that makes you cool to them.

2. lifts in TP says "max capacity: 13 people". i walked in one day and got stuffed like a cb sardine fish. i counted...."eh, 8 people only? and wtf im the biggest sized there?!"

3. did you all know tampines interchange has macs and beside it barely walking 10 meters theres another mac?

4. TP engineering students always complain they are more suited to go JC. "whats your L1R5 ah" i ask them. *silence*.

5. i personally find this interesting. people will leave classrooms abruptly and secretly as if they are going to save the world, then return with a marbolo mentol body odour and not to mention, a stupid snigger on their face.


SIMPLY STUPID:
1. i was attending a tutorial one day and i noticed a similarity about TP enigineering students. teacher asked:" what do you all want to achieve in future?".
malay guy:"policeman and maybe s-league footballer."
teacher:" i see thats good, what about you over there".
cool-looking hip hop indian guy:"policeman".
teacher:" i see good, what about your friend next to you."
26 year old chinese guy:"err....earn my first million before 40 and become a policeman."
spot the similarity yourself ^^ and i swear i didn make this up.

2. shamefully, enigneering students in TP are easily identified by baggy torn jeans, cheap tees and maybe a cap or something. okay even if you never notice their dressing, you can identify them by their behaviour. hanging around staircases smoking, crack jokes that seems only funny to them, shout across 100m just to make his i-knew-him-only-ytd friend acknowledge him.

3.bus drivers in tampines go through a training called eagle-eye and ruthlessness. so if you short of 5 cents change to ride bus dont try your luck to sneak or beg for sympathy cause they will throw you off in seconds. ps: i think the reason why is because each person they catch and throw off earns them free kopi from their colleagues, as in they challenge one another to see how many they can catch. makes sense?


Sickeningly Stupid:
1. you will love this, did you know my course manager is extremely strict and disciplined?hes a specky, long sleeve collared shirt, fierce looking man. 2 days ago he chided us about our studies and i felt so motivated and touch. then today, i was peeing in the toilet and he came in. he went into 1 of the cubicles.........ok you ready? he didnt close the door. AND THE BEST PART IS, he was playing with his urine. "stop,shoot,stop,shoot,stop,shoot,reciprocrate"
get what i mean? i'll keep you my dirty little secret hahahahaha i see why this song exists now.

2. heard of hagen daaz? i cant spell it properly shit. well, TP has vogan haaz.
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ok thats all for now. in any case the tampines mp wanna arrest me i hereby demand this entry remains to warn people about going into the intelligence-reduction zone.